Lemon, Cranberry & Rosemary Focockcia

Serves 8



· 1 cup warm water

· 1 tsp yeast

· ½ tsp sugar

· 1 tsp table salt

· 1 cup whole wheat flour

· 1 cup all-purpose flour

· ¼ cup olive oil

· 2 tablespoons fresh rosemary leaves, chopped

· 1 Meyer lemon sliced paper thin, seeds removed

· ½ cup fresh cranberries, halved

· 1/2 teaspoon sea salt for sprinkling over the top



Preheat your hot box to a sweltering 425 degrees. 

Start by dissolving the yeast and sugar in warm (not hot) water. Add ¼ cup of the all-purpose flour & get a little whisky stirring this up. Let it sit for 10 minutes (yeast is like morning sex - it takes a little while to get active). Add the salt and 2 cups of the flour & combine gently into a soft & sticky mess. Add the remaining 2 cups of flour and mix well (the dough will still be a bit sticky).

Cover and let it rise slowly for 40 minutes in a warm place. Once the dough has risen, oil up your baking sheet like it’s a 70's porn star, place the dough on top, and use your fingers to shape your focockcia.

Put the olive oil into a small bowl and dip your fingers into the oil, then all over the peen, poking the surface & leaving little pools of oil as you go. Don’t be shy with your oil, every peen loves to be lubed up when it's getting a hand job & this will result in great flavor after the bread is baked.

Arrange your lemon slices and cranberry across the top, pressing them lightly into your peen. Scatter your rosemary and sprinkle with coarse sea salt. This carb-filled cock will be ready to deep throat after it’s nice and golden brown from 18-20 minutes in the oven.